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  1. #1411
    Senior Member Darth's Avatar
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    Man killed on golf course!

    MAN KILLED ON GOLF COURSE!


    A foursome of guys were waiting on the men's tee while a foursome of ladies is hitting off from the ladies tee just ahead.


    When the final lady of the foursome tees up and hits her ball she duffs it about 10 feet. She grabs her bag and moves up to the ball. This time she misses the ball completely. Then finally she hacks it another 10 feet.


    She looks back to the men's tee box and says apologetically, 'I guess all those f..king lessons I took over the Winter didn't help one bit.'


    One of the men immediately responded and said, 'Well, there you have it lady. You probably should have taken golf lessons instead.'


    Instantly, and without warning, her club flies with uncanny accuracy.....he never even had a chance to duck....sadly he was only 43.
    Ken, admiral, Fred and 1 others like this.
    "Faster, faster, faster, until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death."
    - Hunter S. Thompson

    “It’s more fun to ride a slow bike fast, than a fast bike slow”.

    "The less horsepower a motorcycle has, the more it can teach you.” - Ben Bostrom

    And though a mountain may rise up and smack the livin' shit outta me,
    and wad up my bike somethin' awful...
    Still, I rise!
    (With apologies to Maya Angelou)


    "Give a Damn"
    - C. M. Howe, Jr.

    Hidden Content

  2. #1412
    Senior Member plumbstraight's Avatar
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    I was in a Bass Pro Shop with my Son in law and gson. They were having a big sale going on with many vendors. We were walking along and this young beauty stops me and asks what do you do for pain? I told her I didn't have any pain. She counters with at your age you don't have any pain? I told her no, I don't. She inquired me further asking me when I get up in the morning if I didn't have a pain or crick in my neck. I told her, when I get up in the morning I leave my pain in the neck in bed. The fellows with her had to turn away and hold themselves together. She went on and asked me if she could use her blinking red lights on my back as she told me they were infra red and were very soothing. As I could see them blinking I told her that the light was not infra red as humans cannot see in the infra red spectrum, but if she would hang those little red blinking lights over her bedroom door we would have something to discuss. With that I left her standing there with her mouth agape. The fellows behind her were about to explode with laughter.
    Mel, Fred and Darth like this.

  3. #1413
    Senior Member admiral's Avatar
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    Purple, littletommy, Fred and 6 others like this.
    Hidden Content A ride in the woods helps me relax and release tension. The fact I'm dragging a body should be entirely irrelevant?

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  5. #1414
    Senior Member Fred's Avatar
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    Are you ready for the mandatory re-education camps for your children?
    https://www.facebook.com/DavidJHarri...urce=permalink
    Apolloha likes this.
    2003 TW200 "Betty Boop"
    2006 TW200 "Nibbler", a.k.a. “Mr.Gizmo"
    Hidden Content All Things Considered I’ld Rather Be Motorcycling

  6. #1415
    Senior Member Sthrnromr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fred View Post
    Are you ready for the mandatory re-education camps for your children?
    https://www.facebook.com/DavidJHarri...urce=permalink
    Apolloha likes this.
    Offroad:
    TW200 - The Goat
    KTM 300 - Orange Dragon
    ATVs

    Onroad:
    Triumphs

    Way too many past bikes and builds to list. I won't bore you. Questions? Just ask.
    =)

  7. #1416
    Senior Member admiral's Avatar
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    Sent from my iPhone

    CAN ADMINS OF THIS GROUP DO A BETTER JOB OF MONITORING WHO IS ALLOWED IN HERE PLEASE?! WE HAVE A NEW MEMBER, AN ELDERLY WOMAN.... SHE'S BEEN PRIVATELY MESSAGING MEMBERS, SENDING THEM NAKED PICTURES OF HERSELF IN NASTY POSES ALONG WITH CLOSE UPS OF HER UNMENTIONABLES. SHE IS OFFERING AN IPHONE 8+ IN EXCHANGE FOR SEXUAL FAVORS. I AM ESPECIALLY BOTHERED BECAUSE IT TURNED OUT TO BE AN IPHONE 6 AND OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING'S WRONG WITH IT CAUSE ITS SUPER SLOW AND THE CAPS LOCK IS STUCK ON.
    Hidden Content A ride in the woods helps me relax and release tension. The fact I'm dragging a body should be entirely irrelevant?

  8. #1417
    Senior Member BUMBLESPECIMOODA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fred View Post
    Are you ready for the mandatory re-education camps for your children?
    https://www.facebook.com/DavidJHarri...urce=permalink
    Kaitlin Bennett is awesome. She does a great job of exposing the dolts on our planet.
    Apolloha likes this.

  9. #1418
    Senior Member GaryL's Avatar
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    An assistant to Nancy Pelosi told her she had a fantastic dream last night. “There was a humongous parade in Washington celebrating Pelosi. Millions lined the parade route, cheering when Nancy went past. Bands were playing; children were throwing confetti into the air; there were balloons everywhere. It was the biggest celebration Washington had ever seen.”
    Nancy was very impressed and said, “That’s really great! By the way, how did I look in your dream? Was my hair okay?”
    Her assistant said, “I couldn’t tell, the casket was closed.

    GaryL























    NVcowboy, admiral and Xracer like this.
    Be Decisive! Right or Wrong just make a decision. ​ The road of life is paved with flat squirrels that couldn't make a decision.

    Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
    If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

    1987 Yamaha BW350 Big Wheel
    2017 Snowdog Track sled tow motor for ice fishing
    Kubota BX2370 Subcompact tractor with snow blower
    Wilderness System Ride 115 fishing Kayaks

  10. #1419
    Senior Member NVcowboy's Avatar
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    My mom went to visit a recently widowed woman. Mom asked how he passed. The widow claimed he died in the middle of love making. Wow, mom said, really? How old was he? The widow said he was 96 and she's 89, they made love every Sunday during church hours. To the sounds of the church bells. In with the ding, out with the dong. That's amazing, my mom said. Yeah, said the widow, and he'd still be alive right now if it wasn't for that ice cream truck!
    buellzebub, Mel, Xracer and 1 others like this.
    If you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk. - Tuco Juan Ramierez aka "The Rat"
    There's 2 kinds of people in this world, those with guns, and those who dig. You dig. - The Man with No Name



    2018 TW200 - LCpl. Rex T. Dubber
    2010 Savage S40 650

  11. #1420
    Senior Member admiral's Avatar
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    I'm posting this with a heavy heart...
    As much as I love riding and offroading, it just takes up too much of my time and I am struggling to keep up with the house chores- cleaning, laundry and such, so something has to give.
    Sadly, I will be getting rid of everything.
    Thank you to everyone who has supported me along the way.

    Below is a list of what's available. Serious inquiries only please and don't insult me with your lowball offers.
    1. Dustpan and broom
    2. Sponges
    3. Dusters
    4. Mop and bucket
    5. Window cleaner
    6. Vacuum
    7. Dishwashing liquid
    8. Laundry detergent
    9. Fabric softener
    10. Laundry baskets
    11. Toilet brush
    12. Cleaning sprays
    13. Scrubbing brushes

    Mel, Ken, jeepster09 and 4 others like this.
    Hidden Content A ride in the woods helps me relax and release tension. The fact I'm dragging a body should be entirely irrelevant?

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