Because Fred likes a funny story
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Thread: Because Fred likes a funny story

  1. #1
    Senior Member Gerry's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
    Paradise, Calif.

    Because Fred likes a funny story

    Long before I discovered the TW, I had a very real appreciation of bicycles. For a few years I and another fellow taught Bicycle Repair and Maintenance through a community outreach program offered by Cal. State Chico. During that time, I had a chance to meet many interesting people. This is a story about 'Lady Di' and I.

    At this point in my life, I had logged more than a few miles on a bicycle. What made this unique was, I had a chance to support someone heading out on their first 'century' ride (100 miles). This was a big deal. My first was like, are you kidding, pedaling 100 miles, no way..... This was her first, and I wanted to help with the learning curve.

    There are many elements to consider; strength, resolve, and the administration of 'comfort'. Perhaps, more to the point is, how do you keep your 'tender' posterior happy when planting it upon a very small surface for hours on end.

    One trick is, minimize moisture. Bicycle or motorcycle, no matter. Corn starch has a less offensive crystalline structure than talc (sharpness of micro particles). As well, it absorbs moisture, which softens tissue and promotes bacterial growth.

    For this event I carried a bigger baggy than usual. Yeh, a few of you already know where this is going.

    During the lunch stop, at the halfway point, Di and I were sitting at a picnic with a few other riders. It seemed a good time to 'self medicate'. I looked at Di and winked. I rocked my head as to motion towards the restroom, and 'discreetly' I thought, presented my baggy of cornstarch as a reminder.

    Our relationship was not one to suggest that be both enter the 'outhouse' together. She went in first, and as women do, she was very neat. I took the bag in and, what the hell, how neat can you be powering you butt while having shorts on (the black bicycle type). I came out looking like I just chalked a major league baseball field by hand. So what, some of you say. My words exactly. WELL, seems a few of our less (bicycle) experienced table mates took note of my baggy of white power. They were as well, aghast at how liberally it was applied. Little did they know.

    Their expressions still make me chuckle. Thanks Fred. Don't know how you moved me in this direction............... Gerry
    Last edited by Gerry; 06-04-2015 at 09:45 PM.
    Take care my Friend.........

  2. #2
    Senior Member Fred's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Turtle Wrangling the Sierras
    This must have been back in the days when Peruvian Marching Powder consumption was trending among the trendy, although normally snorted and not absorbed from the other end. Those other cyclists must have been curious. Gerry never ceases to amaze.
    Actually I had been thinking more about rider comfort on the TW as longer, hotter rides come our way. So corn starch is a good tip. Also support can be an issue too. An impromptu ride a while ago in loose briefs resulted in a bit of crushing to the Hero Twins coming down off a bump. I saw stars. I wore two supportive briefs next time..much safer for the gentleman sausage and eggs.
    So do experienced Iron Butt riders have gel cycling shorts or what?
    2003 TW200 "Betty Boop"
    2006 TW200 "Nibbler", a.k.a. “Mr.Gizmo"
    Hidden Content All Things Considered I’ld Rather Be Motorcycling

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